Just go through this guys. Its hilarious...
1. When Rajnikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
2. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajnikanth allowed to live.
3. Rajnikanth can divide by zero.
4. Rajnikanth can judge a book by it's cover.
5. Rajnikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
6. Rajnikanth can slam a revolving door.
7. Rajnikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
8. Rajnikanth can make onions cry.
9. Rajnikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
10. Rajnikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.
11. Rajnikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
12. Rajnikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
13. Rajnikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
14. Rajnikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.
15. Rajnikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves... at the speed of Rajnikanth.
16. Rajnikanth knows Victoria's secret.
17. Google won't find Rajni coz u don't find Rajni Rajni finds u
18. Rajnikanth leaves message b4 beep.
19. Rajni calls Voldemort by his name.
20. Rajnikanth's calendar goes straight from March 31st 2 April 2nd, no april fools.
21. Rajni once had heart attack. His heart lost.
22. Rajini is so fast, he can run around world n punch himself in back of head.